I wrote you a letter because one you wouldn’t understand right now and two you wouldn’t sit still to listen to me. but once you get older you’ll be able to read all the things mommy post about you. So here it is..
As I carried you for 8 months and pushed you into this world I couldn’t help but feel a magical connection with you the day I found out you were in my belly. You were a surprise to say the least but daddy and I are so thankful God had blessed us with you. As you continue to grow my favorite thing is to see the unconditional love you have for daddy, your brother and I. The way you scream my name when you see me and just run to me laughing. How you snuggle so tightly and closely with me when we go to bed. When you climb up me like a money in a tree and say I got you mommy. The way you love on your daddy when he gets home from work. & how you are always so concerned when daddy leave to walk simba. How you lay in bed in the mornings cuddled with daddy and always suckering him into watching paw patrol. The way you try so hard to be just like your brother or try to impress him. How you look up to him and try to do everything he does. How y’all both rather sleep with each other than alone in your own beds. You’ve grown into a little man who loves to play outside. Who enjoys taking baths and will take them three times a day if you could. I’m pretty sure you get that from daddy. You continue to amaze me with how smart you’ve become. You can count to three and can name two colors red and blue. You know about five different animals and love telling us when you can see the moon. You’re favorite color is blue and favorite snacks are chips and goldfish. Please never stop being brave and a respectful little boy. You will forever be my little baby and I will always be your mama. I hope you have the best day birthday and always remember mommy loves you. Happy birthday little man.
The church my boys and I attended had a sermon series a few months ago about Killing Giants Before They Kill You. Within the series I found one that hit really close to home. It was the giant of good intentions. Now, I will be the first to admit when I try to do something positive it comes out negative. I will also be the first to admit when I feel in my heart I am right about a situation I will not hesitate to back down. We all have good intentions, some intentions fail while other exceed our highest expectation. Yet we still continue to live our life like we are benefiting from helping others. As in “I thought that was a good idea too (insert good intentions here)”. So when I heard the sermon The Giant of Good Intentions for the first time I immediately thought oh my stars Pastor Tim is talking directly to me. Of course there were like 100 more people in the room but I felt like that Sunday God was showing me the steps I need to take. Giving myself not only insight about my direction but the guidance I need to over come this giant. Here we are a few months later and as I was cleaning out my car I found the notes I took that very day. Reading;
Don’t assume good intentions make you untouchable
When it comes to obedience, sweat the small stuff
GET CAUGHT UP IN GOD’S BIGGER STORY
Apparently I needed a little reminder of the sermon these days because I am in sticky situation right now. I have gone above and beyond for someone for a couple of years and so far my intentions have only backfired. People move on and they try to see the positive in every situation..right? NOPE! Not when it comes to my problem, seeing it has only gotten worse. Rereading my notes as well as going back and listening to the Paster talk about good intentions only lead me to reevaluate the out come of the last few “good intentions” I had. Well here goes nothing…
I participated in being smithboy#1 soccer coach with my husbands ex and at the time I thought hey this would be great co-parenting for us! (feeling untouchable)
I put in all the effort when the others didn’t and I was still receiving the short end of the stick. (not sweating the small stuff)
Lastly I was so caught up in the direction I wanted to go yet I wasn’t fully thinking of Gods intentions, and his story for me. How in life everything happens for a reason, and its all based on God plan for us. We might at times don’t see it or even want to acknowledge it but the plan is there. The Lord is there waiting for us. To help us pick up the missing pieces of our life. After all he doesn’t expect us to be perfect, but to have faith in him. Because without faith were would we be?
19 days into October and I have yet to have a pumpkin spice latte, decorate inside our house for Halloween, eat pumpkin bread or even carve a pumpkin for that matter. So today at lunch I saw a huge pumpkin cookie and thought yes I need that. But to be honest I feel like anytime I step into Randals or Target I turn into a implusive buyer. I start going crazy with putting stuff in my cart that I DO NOT need. One day I bought 10 cookie cups. Who in the world buys 10 cookie cups? Yeah.. this girl… anywho like I was saying, this year we weren’t really feeling the holiday spirit. Therefore I had a great reason to buy the cookie. Right? Once the smithboys were finished with their dinner they were allowed to start decorating. Since I’m a RDA I rarely let my boys have tons of sugar so the smithboys were extra grateful. As we all sat around the table I noticed something a little different with each boy. Daddysmith was not thinking about work or bills just feeling completely stress free. Smithboy#1 was happy to be involved with making a dessert for the family. Smithboy#2 was over the moon his brother was showing him how to decorate for the first time. Watching all three of my smiths feeling joy and happiness made myself feel whole. God truly works in mysterious ways. Tonight I think he showed my family that even sitting down and decorating a pumpkin cookie for a few moments makes all the difference. We get caught up with our everyday life’s that we don’t stop and appreciate the small things. So next time you’re at HEB, Target, or Randals stop and pick up a little something for your family or partner. You never know what it might do for you or for them.
Ps. The cookie had so much artificial sugar we only took like two bites. But hey it was the memory we created with one another that matters the most.
Many parents know it’s hard to get alone time when you have kiddos. Parents that have children who play sports know all to well it’s harder to go out with your wife or husband. Our weekends have been super crazy since smithboy#1 started soccer, daddysmith works Friday and Saturdays, along with smithboy#2 being a very active toddler. Like I said before our weekends are crazy, but this weekend was a tad different. Friday was my office party at Main Event so nanny (my mama) came over to watch the boys. Daddysmith got off work early and met me there around 7. The party was from 6-10 with bbq buffet, unlimited drinks, (open bar, thanks chels) bowling, laser tag, and a $25 play card.
I wasn’t the best bowler but I did beat my boss and daddysmith in laser tag. As we were going home we both mentioned how great it was to go out for a couple of hours and be partners not parents. It’s hard for us because most of our friends don’t have kids so they can’t really relate. We definitely go out and socialize but to sports events, HCBC Sunday school or parks. LOL. Anyway, we came home thanked my mama for watching the smithboys and planned out our Saturday since daddysmith was going to work and smithboy#1 had soccer. Tomorrow rolls around I am getting the boys ready for the soccer game when daddysmith calls me and says he won tickets to the UT game playing rock paper scissors. LIKE WTH? Who wins UT football tickets and parking pass playing that game… well my husband thats who. We were debating about even going because we went out the night before and really didn’t want to leave our boys again. On the other hand we were both in shock and never gone to a UT game with one another. What to do?What to do? It just so happens Granny (daddysmiths mama) was back into town and would be delighted to help us out and watch the boys. Those were her exact words btw. With the smithboys picked up and the tickets in our hands, daddysmith and I were on our way to the game. We went, we saw, we fell in love with each other all over again.
If you didn’t see the game you definitely missed out. Double overtime y’all! UT beat Kansas State 40-34!! As we were walking back to the car daddysmith and I couldn’t stop laughing and giving each other smooches. We kept talking about how blessed we were to have one another not just as partners but best friends, and how lucky we were to spend this quality time together. Main Event and the UT game put a little sparkle back into our relationship. Time flies and as adults we rarely stop and enjoy the moments we have with our special someone. I challenge you to leave your kids or fur babies with the grandparents, and take your lover out on a date. Go to the movies, dinner, or even just to get some ice cream. I promise they will 1. Be thrilled to get away for five minutes with you. 2. Be happy you thought of them. 3. You’ll definitely get some kuddo points which always come in handy on a rainy day.
5 weeks, 5 practices, 5 games, and my #5 is killin’ it! Smithboy#1 has made 5 goals since he started soccer a few weeks ago & daddysmith and I couldn’t be more proud. Playing a new sport is always challenging when you first start and maybe even more difficult when your mom who has never played or coached soccer is the teams coach. He is truly enjoying the sport and developing more of passion for it. Before every game he tells us how many goals he wants to make. (Its always five considering thats how old he is and thats his FAVORITE number.) After every game he tells us how many goals he actually made through out the game. Two weeks ago he was upset with himself because he set the goal to make 5 goals as usual but only made two. He got down on himself because us Smiths like the Talladega Nights phrase “If you ain’t first, your last!”. BUT daddysmith has taught the boys, including myself a little something grandpasmith taught him.. “Whenever we don’t succeed, we get up and try harder.” Like I said smithboy#1 was feeling a little bit down in the dumps so daddysmith told him it’s okay buddy but what are we going to do next game? & smithboy#1 said TRY HARDER NEXT TIME!
With the support of daddysmith, smithboy#2 and myself he knew he could conquer anything he put his mind too. One thing I love about my family is the support we have for one another. I grew up playing all different sports as well as my sister and cousins. When I got older I stopped playing but my mom would still take us to every softball and baseball tourney my sister and cousins had. Now that I am older with children of my own I can’t wait to run around taking both smithboy#1 and smithboy#2 to their soccer/baseball/football games as well as going to my little nieces games. Our family might take up a full section at the soccer fields but hey we will do anything to cheer for #5 on Saturday mornings.
Let me start this post off with.. MOVING SUCKS! If you haven’t had a bad experience moving I am calling you a blessed lair. Now lets began..
The first time I moved was out of my mother’s house because I just turned 18 and knew it all but hats another story for another day. Back to moving.. I had a dresser, bed, plus all my clothes and shoes etc. Nothing to crazy, just the things a teenager would have in their room and what soley my mom would let me have considering she bought everything I was taking with me. The move wasn’t bad because my cousin Jesse and his friend helped me move. The only negative thing I can say about move number one was they were late and took their sweet ass time. My second move was easier as well. I think the only reason I can say it went smoothly is because I was 8 months pregnant and nesting. I packed the entire one bedroom apartment up in one day. We hired these two gentleman who daddysmith knew to help us with the move. They came, they moved, and they made me one happy mama. The following day we moved I had unpacked the ENTIRE house. Like I previously said I was 8 months pregnant and nesting. Mamas you’ll know exactly what I’m talkin about. (Btw that was my favorite move.) So here we are at my most recent move.. 2 adults, 2 kiddos and 1 pup later we had a bunch of junk I mean stuff. I am working full time, while maintaining being a soccer mom and coach, also a full time mama and wife so I was slowly packing up the house. Daddysimith hired a moving company this time the day before our move to help us out. This is when the as my mom would say it “shit hit the fan”. They were scheduled to come between 1-2 Sunday afternoon. When 2 o’clock arrived and no moving company daddysmith called and they said they were running late and would be here around 7-8. Considering both smithboys go to bed at the very latest 9 I was furious. Along with the movers dilemma, AT&T was all messed up and we didn’t have our internet or cable connected. 7:30 rolls around and we get a very unpleasant phone call.. The moving company was still in Kyle (a hour away) and would able to move us closer to 9-10 PM. Y’all at this point I was just at a loss for words. Thank goodness for my husband and his friend Taylor because with out them I would’ve been losing my freaking mind and going off on the drivers. Taylor and daddysmith brought over our mattress, smithboy#2 crib, along with some random boxes so we could stay at our new place. I didn’t mention the random boxes to them because they were just trying to help. Daddysmith called another company who was there to rescue us the following morning. They started @ 8:15 and ended @ 11:15. As of now we are a few days into our new place and I have yet to finish unpacking. No excuse as to why just want everything in a particularly place. House is still a little messy but we will due. We are just happy the move is over and we can enjoy our new place as a family.
As the days turn into months and months into years people evolve. Some change and better themselves with positivity and acceptance while others fall in a trap of deep selfishness and insecurities. Recently my husband and I went to a class at the church we’ve attended for quite sometime now. The class was called next steps. We knew going to praise God on Sundays, listening to the pastors message and applying it to our everyday life’s was something we enjoyed doing together. So what can we do next to get closer to God and to get spiritually closer to one another? HCBC had the answer.. Next Steps! Like I said before we attended the class and came out with a clearer understanding of what it meant to be apart of Gods world and what it means to fully accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior. The lady who was instructing the class drew a line on a white board and this is what it looked like;
You The Lord
She said you are on the left and you think you are on a journey to be on the right but you’re wrong. We attempt different things in our life to become more like him. God is understanding, loving, forgiving, compassionate, selfless. We as humans are loving and understanding but also angry, despiteful, and manipulative. The lord does not carry those attributes. We think by volunteering, pay for someones starbucks, coming to church every Sunday, and praying to him we are going to more like him. Well y’all are wrong. You need not to please God or to be like him. He created you to be YOU. Therefore we need not to go trough life with the plans we have created for ourselves but we need to enjoy his plan, his path. We all at one point tried to be someone we aren’t. Tried to impress, tried to one up one another, tried to point the finger and blame someone else for our flaws. But when is enough, enough? When are we going to stop trying to be what social media wants us to be? When are going to stop listening or worrying about what others think about us? When are we going to look in the mirror and be completely content with who is looking back? Today was a difficult day for me. Theses past couple of weeks I was pretending to be a person who someone wanted me to be. Entertaining others wants and needs before mine. I was going backwards in my journey, & today was the day the walls of pretending, lies and insecurities came crumbling down. I felt hurt but also relieved. I said to myself enough is enough. I will no longer let this persons negativity get to me. I will no longer take steps back on my path. I will no longer be a person SHE wants me to be. I will be the person HE created me to be. Enough was enough. At this moment I ask you.. when you look at yourself in the mirror are you who he created you to be or what society wants you to be. Is enough.. enough?
I picked up a new hobby these next few months…y’all are personally looking at smithboy#1 soccer coach! Oh yes, you absolutely read that right. I am PAYSL soccer coach for the 2017 fall season. If you personally know me from my younger years, you would know I have never played soccer nor have I watched a single soccer game. Why? First, it was too much running in my opinion and two I’ve never been good at kicking a ball around. BUT I am determined to make this season the absolute best for my son and his team. My mother law, husband/daddysmith, both smithboys, and I all went to Academy to get the gear we would need. It was easy enough to get soccer cleats, shinguards, ball and socks for smithboy#1 but what in the heck do I need to be a coach. My googled listed looked a little like this:
Now my husbands and his mothers list looked a little different:
Rolling cart (if you are a sports person you know what I am talking about. If you aren’t, look at the following pic.)
3 Camping Chairs to sit and watch the game (not just two adult ones but a toddler one for smithboy #2)
Shinguards for smithboy#2
As you can tell, both of them obviously knew what they were doing and wanting. So who’s list did we use? Both of course! Because Granny (mother-n-law) can never say no to her grandsons. This past Thursday was our first team practice. With my fingers crossed, I was hoping I had players who played before. I was in for surprise and half of the kids played 2017 spring ball! 45 minutes later practice was over, the kiddos were exhausted, parents were happy and I was dripping in sweat. Now with that being said I want to personally thank Pinterest for all the how to’s, pictures and drills. Mom’s if you haven’t got a Pinterest I highly suggest you do, it is a HUGE LIFE SAVER! Saturday was upon us and that only means one thing, game day! @ 12:30 we played our very first game against the tigers and won! Since the league says the kids are too young and just need to learn the fundamentals they did not keep score. However in my eyes and the kiddos eyes our team is number one! Way to go Tornados and lets keep it up!
First practice| Go Tornados
** The rolling cart was a huge success. I was able to pack the soccer bag with all the essentials, the 3 chairs, toys, waters and smithboy#2 small toddler body in the cart and roll it to the field. Daddysmith 1 – Mamasmith 0
As a busy mom there are times I need my boys to sit, be still and quiet. Now with my two rambunctious kiddos its hard to do just that. There are also times daddysmith is playing his video games and the smithboys like to be just like their daddy and want to play games too. So after a couple of weeks of trail and error I have found the perfect apps for my smithboys. Today I put a list together of our favorite iPad and iPhone apps that help my boys be creative with their learning. We also have quite a few action games like Future Fight, MinionRush, DC Legends, and LEGO Ninjago, I mean boys will boys.. I hope these apps will teach and encourage your littles like it does for mine.
Endless Learning Academy by Originator Inc.; This is both of my sons favorite app. From teaching them to read and sing classic children’s songs to learning spanish this app does it all. Our youngest (smithboy#2) who is 1 will sit for 10 minutes straight playing and learning is 123’s. Our oldest (smithboy#1) will click “spell” because he likes “helping the robot learn his words”. You can trial each of these individually or you can save some money and buy them all together. Either way this app is definitely our boys go to!
2. Box Island by Radiant Games; smithboy#1 loves coding. He is very into his robot who moves around and does things he tells him to do. I wanted to find an app that was similar when we were on the road and I found just that with Box Island. I will have to say this app is for older kids because the age starts at 6. Since he is only 5 I had to show him the ropes at first but he slowly was able to do it himself. The object of the game is to collect the stars. By doing so you have tell the box which way to go for him to collect the stars. A fun concept for small minds to learn how to code. oh and by the way IT IS FREE!
3. Bible for Kids by Life.Church; As a firm believer of Christ, I like to incorporate the Lord in our everyday life. While learning about God is important, having fun doing so should be just as important. The Bible for Kids app allows my sons to listen and interact with the story being told. I read chapters from the Bible every day and whichever book/chapter I am on I like to share the story with my littles at bedtime. This is an easy way for me to do so. The app also has little rewards for each activity they have accomplished. Which is always a win win for myself and my boys. The app is free and a very easy way to connect to God with your children everyday.