In today’s society we see new people almost every day. We see new friend suggestions on our social media sites. We drive by people on our way to work /school and yet out of those I don’t know 10 people we see we don’t stop and say, “Hello”. We simply just move on with our day to day routine. Now let me ask you, why is that? Why are we hesitate to welcome new people into our lives? I am going to take a wild guess and say fear of rejection. Maybe not for all but for most of us including myself, I am constantly in question of meeting new people because I am afraid of getting brushed to the side. One of my many flaws I’m unable to conquer.. so I thought… Two weeks ago I finished a book called Uninvited, living loved when you feel less than, left out and lonely within one week! Many of you aren’t aware but I’ve never been fond of reading. (Sorry mom I pretty much lied on all my reading logs growing up.) These days the most reading I do is scrolling down my social media feed or insurance breakdowns when I am working. So for me to pick up this book and finish it in less than 5 days is definitely a job well done and a huge pat on the back. In light of that information, I wanted to share with y’all that I learned about feeling rejected. My story starts way back when I was a little girl. I was my mom and dads first little one. Their relationship doesn’t work out shortly after I was born so they separated. My mother got married and had another little one and my father met someone else and had three little ones. Growing up I stayed mostly with my mother but occasionally I would go and spend the weekend with my father. The huge difference between each parent was the way each one made me feel. With my mother I always felt at home, like being with her is where I belonged. With my father, I felt like I had to compete for his time and with everything else in his life. Being a child raised to compete I quickly learned rejection. By the time I was 14 I told my mother how left out by his lack of love and connection for me. That’s when I first understood rejection. It’s been some time since I last spoke to my father but the feeling has never really gone away. As I read Uninvited I came to realize a few things;
1. I’ve dwelled on this feeling of rejection for over 9 years and it has only affected my potential to create new relationships.
2. I am continuing to think rejection is my fault and it’s not.
3. That with Jesus, I’m forever safe. I’m forever accepted. I’m forever held. Completely loved and always invited in.
Not only did this book help me understand the past rejections it has helped me pull through this current rejection. Lysa states “The voices of condemnation, shame, and rejection can come at you, but they don’t have to reside in you.” She couldn’t be more right. Just because someone has their own opinion about you doesn’t make it the truth. Just because someone doesn’t like you doesn’t mean the next person won’t want to become best friends with you. We don’t need to let the rejection consume our thoughts because then it will ultimately control us. And at that point, the devil wins. But we all know the truth… “The lord is our shepherd, we lack nothing. He makes us lie down in green pastures, he leads us beside quiet waters, he refreshes our soul. He guides us along the right path for his names’ sake. Even though we walk through the darker valley we will fear no evil, for he is with us.” We can always change our bad habits and next time you start to feel rejected think about how much God loves you and how when we put our faith in him nothing can defeat us.